|Age||Either 20s or 30s|
|Occupation||Drug dealer, pedophile, sex offender, stalker, & serial killer.|
|Voiced by||Sean Kiely|
Esquire (voiced by Sean Kiely) first appeared in Sugar Trip. He is an 'exposed entrepreneur' (drug dealer), according to Satan, who currently resides in the alleyways of a (mostly) deserted town. He remains as one the most popular secondary characters in the series, as he has made an appearance in every episode since Sugar Trip, and the only secondary character to play a major role in more than one episode. He's a registered sex offender. He lives in beaver springs pa and is known to touch trees and other wild life.
He traded cocaine for a Coin and Pubic hairs to Leo and Satan and promptly left, saying "Even trade, baby" in a husky and gravelling voice. He also appeared in Trash Hazard crying after Leo died, asking "Oh, why?" as tears ran down his face. He is also a pedophile, as he is known to stalk children (this is evident in Sugar Trip when he is watching a young child on a slide from behind a bush and being right outside the window of Leo's house in Trash Hazard).
He is the only background character seen more than once so far. In Trash Hazard, his eyes seem to be very red, so it's safe to say that he is probably under the influence of a substance, heavily drunk, or sleep deprived during the events of the series. He could possibly only have one testicle, as he said "bollock" instead of "bollocks" in this video. He is also a serial killer, as he cut off leo's bus driver's face, killing him in the process and wearing it like a mask in Leo Goes to School.